Random ruminations of a sassy Scot
My thoughts on life, love, the world, my ambitions, hopes and dreams
I feel overall that I’m winning my battle with anxiety. I’m feeling more positive and more like myself. Whether that is due to medication, my self-care or a combination of both, I don’t know but whatever it is, I’m not complaining. Long may it last! There is one black cloud approaching on the horizon. Work. …
Continue reading “Decision deadline approaches…”
I am not perfect. I make mistakes. Sometimes I speak without thinking. Sometimes what I say comes out wrong. Sometimes I say the wrong thing. Some days I feel like I can take on the world, other days getting out of bed is a challenge. I try my best. I’m still learning. My mental health …
Continue reading “A work in progress”
I’ve kept a diary for years, my memory isn’t great so it’s nice to have a record of my life. I also find it therapeutic. Its nice to have somewhere to note my thoughts, fears, worries, hopes and successes. I know that living in the past is not healthy. I am happy in the present …
Continue reading “Looking back to move forward”
On International Friendship Day, this seems very appropriate. I’m lucky that I have amazing friends. I may not have a huge number but those that I have are worth their weight in gold and I wouldn’t swap that for all the money in the world. Life may have taken us in different directions and we …
As I wake to news of two shootings in the USA, one in El Paso, Texas and the other in Dayton, Ohio. I think of those whose lives have been changed irrevocably. I think of the loss and the senselessness of it. Innocent people going about their lives, enjoying a night out or shopping on …
Continue reading ““Be excellent to each other””
As I’ve been at home more recently, I’ve spent a lot more time with my cat. He’s always been like my shadow but even more so now. He was a stray so its taken him some time to adapt to having a human and live with a human. He’s always been friendly, he’d come to …
Continue reading “Be more cat”
This is what I’ve been doing today. Its been a bit of a rollercoaster week, my emotions have been on quite a ride seeing good days and tough days. Today is a tough day but there we go. Today has involved washing my bed sheets. I love that feeling of getting into bed when there’s …
Continue reading “Self-care Saturday”
Today has been a bad day. Nothing particularly bad has happened, I’m just tired of feeling like I’m living on my nerves all the time. I’m tired of feeling jittery and jumping at every notification that my phone sounds. Tired of jumping at every noise the wind makes. Tired of feeling overwhelmed. I know it …
Continue reading “Tired of feeling anxious”
The image I have in my head is of arm wrestling contest. I’m trying to win so hard, the tendons and muscles in my arm are straining with the effort but anxiety is too strong and is kicking my butt. To use a boxing analogy, today my anxiety has me on the ropes. I feel …
Continue reading “Anxiety is winning today”
Its late or early depending on which way you look at it. I’m still awake. I have a thumping headache. I can’t sleep. Blogging won’t help me sleep but at least I’m doing something productive. I’m tempted to clean the bathroom but I have good neighbours and it would be very anti-social at this hour …
I’ve noticed that this can be something I have a tendency to do. Let me explain what I mean. For the past few months I’ve been trying to lose weight, exercise more and get healthy. For the last few weeks, while I’ve been battling my anxiety, I’ve ordered a couple of takeaways and am in …
Continue reading “Self sabotage and me”
I don’t set out to be awkward or contrary, it just seems to happen that way. If I’m in the supermarket doing my shopping, I always somehow manage to choose the item with the barcode that doesn’t scan….my ‘best’ example of this is the day I picked up the jar of pickled beetroot without any …
Continue reading “If there’s an easy way or an awkward way…”
I’ve felt a bit off today, a bit stressed and anxious but nothing I can really put my finger on. My sleep hasn’t been great for a few weeks which doesn’t help, but then I’ve never been a great sleeper anyway. The milk was sour this morning but it is summer so it happens and …
Continue reading “Trying to think positively”
My battle with anxiety is ongoing, I’m taking it one day at a time. Today I’m feeling slightly more anxious as my focus turns to my physical health. I have an appointment with a consultant in relation to my high blood pressure. My GP has been checking it regularly since I started taking medication. I’ve …
Continue reading “Healthy body…healthy mind”
Today is a beautiful sunny day. Only a few white fluffy clouds in the sky. A gorgeous summer’s day. Unfortunately today, I’m just not feeling it. My heart is beating fast, I feel sick, I’m very jumpy and my hands are shaking. I know it’ll pass. Right now, anxiety is kicking my ass. I don’t …
Continue reading “Anxiety 1, Sassy 0”
